Sleeping at the Drive-in

So I went to my first drive-in movie on Saturday and it was awesome!

For some reason the Grease song kept playing over and over in my head…

“Stranded at the drive-in, branded a fool.

What will they say, Monday at school.”

I could practically see John Travolta with his skin-tight black pants and bouffant hair (wait, Sandy wore the same thing… hmmm) swinging and singing with the giant movie screen as the backdrop.

“Oh Sandy! Baby, someday when high-yi-yayi school is done…”

(um, so yeah, maybe there is some substance to the allegations of late... just sayin')

But as with just about any other movie, I fell asleep.  It doesn’t matter what time of day or night, movie theater, at home, or sitting in a fold-up camping chair at a drive-in – I fall asleep. Every. Damn. Time.  Even if it is a movie I have been dying to see!

Granted, Battleship wasn’t the best flick, but it was loud enough to wake the dead!  But apparently not loud enough to keep me awake. 

Yes, I have a pulse.  I checked.

I’m thinking this is some sort of disorder perhaps?  Maybe some form of narcolepsy – like, I don’t know, cinimatogolepsy. I know I can’t be the only person in the world to suffer from this disorder.  Question is: how do you cure it?!

Massage therapy?

 

Lessons I’ve learned in the last 5 months (Part 1)

Blogging?  I’m too busy living!

 

And yet, here I am… after a long hiatus from the blogosphere, I’ve decided to come back and share my not so interesting life with you.

 

Lessons I’ve learned in the last 5 months (Part 1):

1. Lice are NOT fun!
2.  Don’t let your 5 year old wear fake tattoos on areas of the body that cannot be concealed by clothing. Teachers don’t like it.
3. Let your 15 year old stepson do his OWN laundry to avoid awkward moments.  Eww!
4. Acknowledge the signs of heat exhaustion BEFORE it’s too late.  No bueno :-/
5. Beer, vodka, orange juice, monster, jagermeister and hot tubs don’t mix.
6. Breeding English Bulldogs is a freaking nightmare and I’ll never do it again.
7. Crawfish enchiladas are the BOMB!  Thanks P!
8. Wishing yourself thin doesn’t work (and neither did My Fitness Pal).
9. Ash is not a good color for me.
10. Tan lines are the DEVIL!
11. Don’t ever agree to take in another animal when you already have two adults, a 15 year old stepson, two little girls (5 & 6) two dogs and one cat in a 1600 sq.ft. home.
12. Roller-skating is fun at any age!  Just don’t hold hands with your 5 & 6 year old. There’s nothing worse than a really awkward 31 year old woman in the middle of reliving her youth, trying to catch her balance on roller skates, (while still trying to look cool) falling backwards with legs flailing in the air, and nearly hitting her head on the lubed up hardwood floors.  Who knew a 5 year old could take down a grown ass woman?!
13. I’ll never win “Mother of the Year”